This is an interesting phrase from the show, 江湖!
说了你又不听，听又不懂，懂又不做，做又做错，错又不认，认又不改，改又不服，不服也不说，那叫我怎么办？
Monday, July 30, 2012
Saturday, July 28, 2012
What is Verbal Abuse?
Source: What is verbal abuse?
Verbal abuse is a form of battery that involves the use of words, rather than blows and punches. In a verbally abusive situation, words are used to attack, control, and inflict harm on another person. Verbally abusive behavior goes far beyond mean behavior; it involves inflicting psychological violence on another person, attacking the very nature of an individual's being and attempting to destroy his or her spirit. Verbal abuse can affect people of all ages and in all types of relationships. However, it is especially prevalent in marital relationships.
A number of behaviors are considered verbally abusive, including angry outbursts, screaming rages, and name-calling. Verbal abuse often includes blaming, brainwashing, and intimidation. Hidden aggression is a part of verbal abuse, as well. Verbal abuse is extremely manipulative, as insults are often disguised as caring comments. Verbal abuse can be overt or covert, but it is always about controlling and manipulating the victim.
Often, verbally abusive comments are offered as jokes. When the target of the joke is hurt or insulted, the verbal abuser laughs it off and says that the victim is overly sensitive. However, the intent of the verbal abuser is to cause this hurt. After a time, verbal abuse often escalates into physical abuse.
Arguments in verbally abusive relationships are far different from those in healthy relationships. Normally, people argue over real issues that have the potential to be resolved. In verbally abusive arguments, real conflicts are not the issue and problems are not resolved. The abuse becomes the issue, and often the victim is told that everything is always his or her fault.
Often, verbal abusers tell their victims what to think and how to feel. They typically refuse to see or understand the victim’s point of view. In fact, they often object, in a violently verbal way, to the victim’s opinions and desires. Verbal abusers often deny reality and attempt to keep their victims confused by constantly changing or distorting the issue.
Withholding is often a major part of verbal abuse. In a verbally abusive relationship, the abuser may withhold information, affection, support, or money. When the abuse victim attempts to speak up about such issues, the verbal abuser denies the issue altogether.
Verbal abusers often seek to isolate their partners, cutting off or blocking their relationships with friends and family. Sometimes, the verbal abuser works to convince the victim that the abuser is the only person who really cares about or likes the victim. In some cases, the verbal abuser may admit to his or her behavior and agree to stop. Typically, however, the behavior begins again within a short period of time.
Verbal abuse can be described as stealthy; it leaves wounds that are not visible to the naked eye. As it harms the mind and spirit, it can be more difficult to recognize than physical abuse. Also, its victims become so torn down by it that they are often unable to notice the abuse themselves.
Low self-esteem and confusion are ever-present in the minds of the verbally abused. The abuser is often able to convince the victim that he or she is the problem. In fact, verbal abusers often accuse the abused of playing the victim.
Eventually, the verbal abuse victim becomes so worn down by the abuse that he or she becomes unable to put up a defense against it. Often, the victim begins to try to change or placate the abuser, thinking that such change will improve the relationship. Sadly, verbal abusers typically do not change on their own. For real change to occur, professional psychiatric help is usually required.
Verbal abuse is a form of battery that involves the use of words, rather than blows and punches. In a verbally abusive situation, words are used to attack, control, and inflict harm on another person. Verbally abusive behavior goes far beyond mean behavior; it involves inflicting psychological violence on another person, attacking the very nature of an individual's being and attempting to destroy his or her spirit. Verbal abuse can affect people of all ages and in all types of relationships. However, it is especially prevalent in marital relationships.
A number of behaviors are considered verbally abusive, including angry outbursts, screaming rages, and name-calling. Verbal abuse often includes blaming, brainwashing, and intimidation. Hidden aggression is a part of verbal abuse, as well. Verbal abuse is extremely manipulative, as insults are often disguised as caring comments. Verbal abuse can be overt or covert, but it is always about controlling and manipulating the victim.
Often, verbally abusive comments are offered as jokes. When the target of the joke is hurt or insulted, the verbal abuser laughs it off and says that the victim is overly sensitive. However, the intent of the verbal abuser is to cause this hurt. After a time, verbal abuse often escalates into physical abuse.
Arguments in verbally abusive relationships are far different from those in healthy relationships. Normally, people argue over real issues that have the potential to be resolved. In verbally abusive arguments, real conflicts are not the issue and problems are not resolved. The abuse becomes the issue, and often the victim is told that everything is always his or her fault.
Often, verbal abusers tell their victims what to think and how to feel. They typically refuse to see or understand the victim’s point of view. In fact, they often object, in a violently verbal way, to the victim’s opinions and desires. Verbal abusers often deny reality and attempt to keep their victims confused by constantly changing or distorting the issue.
Withholding is often a major part of verbal abuse. In a verbally abusive relationship, the abuser may withhold information, affection, support, or money. When the abuse victim attempts to speak up about such issues, the verbal abuser denies the issue altogether.
Verbal abusers often seek to isolate their partners, cutting off or blocking their relationships with friends and family. Sometimes, the verbal abuser works to convince the victim that the abuser is the only person who really cares about or likes the victim. In some cases, the verbal abuser may admit to his or her behavior and agree to stop. Typically, however, the behavior begins again within a short period of time.
Verbal abuse can be described as stealthy; it leaves wounds that are not visible to the naked eye. As it harms the mind and spirit, it can be more difficult to recognize than physical abuse. Also, its victims become so torn down by it that they are often unable to notice the abuse themselves.
Low self-esteem and confusion are ever-present in the minds of the verbally abused. The abuser is often able to convince the victim that he or she is the problem. In fact, verbal abusers often accuse the abused of playing the victim.
Eventually, the verbal abuse victim becomes so worn down by the abuse that he or she becomes unable to put up a defense against it. Often, the victim begins to try to change or placate the abuser, thinking that such change will improve the relationship. Sadly, verbal abusers typically do not change on their own. For real change to occur, professional psychiatric help is usually required.
Friday, July 27, 2012
Finger reading
Look at your own little finger (Men left hand, women right hand, palm facing yourself),
Among the three little finger sections, the section that is the longest your advantage.
1. (Figure 1) Top section being the longest. You are attractive, good language skills, good at expressing oneself and have excellent powers of observation, not easily fooled by others.
2. (Figure 2) Middle section being the longest. You are naturally good at taking care of people and strong tolerance. A lot of health care workers have longest middle section.
3. (Figure 3) Bottom section being the longest. You like freedom, longing for carefree private life. You are also reasonable and good at debate.
Look at your own little finger (Men left hand, women right hand, palm facing yourself),
Among the three little finger sections, the section that is the shortest your weakness.
4. (Figure 4) Top section being the shortest. You are weak at expressing yourself. You are born shy, which is why it is hard to understand yourself. You are less popular among friends.
5. (Figure 5) Middle section being the shortest. You are a person with loyalty. Your attitude of doing things is all the same. Your position is not easy to change. These seemingly are advantages but in another words, you are not flexible, stubborn.
6. (Figure 6) Bottom section being the shortest, You are naive and easy to believe others. Naive can also be "innocent" which can sometimes be ignorant, be careful!
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Mine is 1 and 5.
- Top section being the longest. You are attractive, good language skills, good at expressing oneself and have excellent powers of observation, not easily fooled by others.
- Middle section being the shortest. You are a person with loyalty. Your attitude of doing things is all the same. Your position is not easy to change. These seemingly are advantages but in another words, you are not flexible, stubborn.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Singaporean earning $2,500 monthly cannot obtain loan from HDB to buy flat
Yes, I wish him luck too. From what I read, he could just be a little boy who just got married for less than 2 years. Seeing how ridiculous his childish thinking is, I thought it'll be interesting to repost this. Come on lah!!! When you get married, move out of your mother's bossom!!! You are a big boy now...a good time to start being the head of the house. Instead of protecting your wife, you want to divorce her because of mummy??? Then why get married in the first place when you are still drinking milk from the bottle. And wife! You know your husband wants to move out but is unable to get a loan with his salary....why are you still a housewife? Shouldn't you get a job too???? *faint*
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Source: Singaporean earning $2,500 monthly cannot obtain loan from HDB to buy flat
Buying a flat is a problem for me. I am self employed and my wife is a house wife. Earning about 30 k yearly but when I try to buy a flat and apply for housing loan eligibility, HDB ask for my bank statement.
After submitting my statement for 1 yr, they telling me my loan is not approve. Reasons is that I have not enough saving in the bank and HDB cannot give me a loan. They want me to have constant of saving in order to obtain a loan from them afraid that I will not pay for the loan. They are telling me HDB is only giving loan to those who is rich and to those who put their saving in the bank.
In the first place if I have the cash I will not need to apply a loan from HDB and I will buy a condo or bungalow already. In the newspaper, I can see advertisement that family enough $900 per month can buy a flat and get a loan from HDB. Now I earn $2500 cannot get a loan from HDB.I need to save up a year to show them in order to obtain a loan from them.
My wife and mother is not getting along very well, we often quarrel over housing matters but I got to wait for 1 year to obtain a loan. Hopefully, we can go through this 1 year, if not I will have to divorce over this housing matters and my daughter will have to grow up in a broken family. If all this will to happen , I will thank the govt and HDB for letting all this to happen.
Wish me luck!
SPENCER SIM
*The above was first posted as a comment on PM Lee’s Facebook.
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Source: Singaporean earning $2,500 monthly cannot obtain loan from HDB to buy flat
Buying a flat is a problem for me. I am self employed and my wife is a house wife. Earning about 30 k yearly but when I try to buy a flat and apply for housing loan eligibility, HDB ask for my bank statement.
After submitting my statement for 1 yr, they telling me my loan is not approve. Reasons is that I have not enough saving in the bank and HDB cannot give me a loan. They want me to have constant of saving in order to obtain a loan from them afraid that I will not pay for the loan. They are telling me HDB is only giving loan to those who is rich and to those who put their saving in the bank.
In the first place if I have the cash I will not need to apply a loan from HDB and I will buy a condo or bungalow already. In the newspaper, I can see advertisement that family enough $900 per month can buy a flat and get a loan from HDB. Now I earn $2500 cannot get a loan from HDB.I need to save up a year to show them in order to obtain a loan from them.
My wife and mother is not getting along very well, we often quarrel over housing matters but I got to wait for 1 year to obtain a loan. Hopefully, we can go through this 1 year, if not I will have to divorce over this housing matters and my daughter will have to grow up in a broken family. If all this will to happen , I will thank the govt and HDB for letting all this to happen.
Wish me luck!
SPENCER SIM
*The above was first posted as a comment on PM Lee’s Facebook.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Happy National Day (8 Aug)
In less than a month time, Singapore will be having our national birthday. So let me wish everyone a Happy International Day....National Day, I mean :p
This is one of my favorite song.....
This is one of my favorite song.....
Original Version
SINdie Version
(My favorite version, not merely because Chen Enlai is in there but because it is really funny!)
Words Edited Version
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