Welcome to Australia

I got this email some time ago and thought it was really interesting and hilarious. The FAQ were said to be posted on an Australian Tourism website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials...not sure how true but they did manage to make my day...

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cains, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night at Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Austrlia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tra-lia is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can Dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can see it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay night clubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas

Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the Girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross*. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

Glass doors on MRT

Suiciders will have to think of newer and more creative ways to commit suicide coz glass doors will be installed on all non-underground train stations. I guess there's just too many people trying to see if they have super powers by jumping onto the track to try. Sad to say, it wasn't a really bright idea to test water.

I took those photos when I was in Hong Kong earlier this year. This should give you an idea of what the glass doors are going to look like. Nope, it won't be full panel. The doors will be about the height of your waist or even higher if you are not too tall. Suiciders can still jump but it'll take more efforts and planning.

Then again, why commit suicide when it is just a permanent solution to a temporary problem???

Fried Hokkien Mee - 抢摊大行动 (Buzzing Cashier)

After watching 抢摊大行动 (Buzzing Cashier) on channel 8 , I decided to try out the winning Fried Hokkien Mee. In a way, I want to lend my support to the single mother and another, because I'm a fan of Chef Eric. A chinese paper reported that the mother didn't want to take up the offer initially when approached by the TV station because she didn't have the confident. But a few coaxing later, she decided to give it a try. I'm glad she did.

Upon reaching Blk 127 Toa Payoh Lor 1 #02-19 at 3pm, I queued for 30mins just to taste the Fried Hokkien Mee. The queue was never-ending....people just kept coming so much so that the drink stall ran out of sugarcane juice (from serving the customers who turned up to try the noodle).

I ordered beehoon. They didn't look like the one on the signboard...I guess I turned up too late...they must have ran out of la la or mussels. I love the yummy chili sauce and the dark sauce in the beehoon. There's fresh seafood taste yet not over-powering, not too saltish nor blend. This is indeed Fried Hokkien Mee with a twist. I'm not sure about you...but I'm going back for more :p I heard that they open at 7am but start selling at 8am....go early if you want full ingredients. You can order the $3 or $3.50 plate (I went for the $3.50).



Address: Blk 127 Toa Payoh Lor 1, #02-19
Opening time: 8am
Price: $3 or $3.50
Take bus 231 from Toa Payoh Interchange


View Larger Map