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5 reasons you're still single
Why you’re single 1: You have an unrealistic checklist
If your list of favourable traits is more than a couple of points
long, it might be time to start editing it. A tall, dark, handsome man
who loves washing up and never forgets an anniversary? A lady with
blonde hair and blue eyes who loves watching football games and cooking
dinner every evening? Good luck with that. If you don’t want a smoker or
someone with children, that’s fine – decide on these absolute
non-negotiables, but then overlook the
‘not-too-sure-about-this-but-could-probably-live-with-it’ points. When
searching for your idea of a perfect partner, there’s a good chance that
you’re bypassing many wonderful potential partners who probably have
special qualities that you’d never even thought of adding to your list
before.
Why you’re single 2: You reveal too much, too soon
Of course dates are all about sharing information about yourself and
getting to know each other, but when you feel the need to share all
about your last breakup, the medication you’re taking and your family
troubles, it’s probably going to put this potential new partner off.
While you’re hoping that your date is thinking “wow, he/she is really
interesting” they’re more likely to be thinking something along the
lines of “is this really something I’d like to be involved with?” While
it’s good to reveal enough information to keep your date interested,
it’s really not a good idea to reveal a year’s worth of information in
just one night.
Why you’re single 3: You’re too clingy
If you’ve known each other for five minutes yet you suddenly start
calling her throughout the day to see what she’s up to or you drop by
his guys’ night in because you wanted to check up on him, you’re heading
for a dating disaster. If this is you then please do forgive us if we
sound harsh, but you need to get a life. Your potential gentleman or
lady friend will find it attractive if you have a life of your own.
Having your own hobbies and interests shows that you’re an interesting,
well-rounded person and gives you plenty to talk about when you are
together. It’s scary for your other half to feel as though they are your
whole world. One foot out of place and your whole world comes crashing
down? Ouch – that’s a lot of pressure.
Why you’re single 4: You fall for the wrong type
Whether it’s a lady with three children and a law degree or a short
gentleman with a passion for the great outdoors who loves animals, most
of us have a ‘type’ of person that we tend to be attracted to. If you’ve
had a few failed relationships though, it might be time to start
rethinking your ‘type’. Do you always fall for the type who likes to
‘play the field’? Or the type who works so hard that you never see them?
If this is the case and it’s never worked out, it might be time to
re-evaluate what you’d like in a partner. The mistake that many people
make is sticking to one specific ‘type’ and watching the relationship
fail time and time again. Psychotherapist Jill Murray highlights that
many failed relationships happen because we believe that we can take
this person under our wing and eventually change or ‘tame’ them. If you
feel like you need to change them, they’re probably not your type after
all.
Why you’re single 5: Your negativity reflects on the outside
It doesn’t matter how nice you feel in your new clothes or how
confident you are with your new haircut, if you’re feeling negative,
it’s going to show on the outside. If you’ve been on a string of
unsuccessful dates, there’s a good chance you’ll not have the most
positive vibes about this one either. Just because your best friend’s
girlfriend cheated on him or your parent’s relationship broke up when
you were young, this does not mean that the dating scene is the devil’s
playground. While you may still need to kiss a few more frogs before you
find your prince or princess, if you end up coming across the partner
of your dreams but you feel grumpy thoughout the date, it’s likely that
you’ll end up giving off a bad impression. Approach your date with an
open mind and you quadruple your chances of it being successful!
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